


All I Wanted

by dawnheart



Category: Bob's Burgers (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst with a Happy Ending, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Future Fic, Getting Together, Jealousy, M/M, School Dances
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:47:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24362275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dawnheart/pseuds/dawnheart
Summary: Another school dance, another time for the same-old-thing to happen. Zeke knows how this goes: Jimmy Jr will pretend to not want to go with Tina and then will end up going with her. Zeke wishes things could be different this time.
Relationships: Jimmy Pesto Jr./Zeke (Bob's Burgers)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 23





	All I Wanted

Zeke likes school dances, but Jimmy Jr. loves them. It's his time to shine. And Zeke loves when Jimmy Jr. is happy, shining, proud, and free. Expressing himself to the fullest extent. Zeke is proud of him, too. And Zeke feels happy watching, being a part of it, cheering him on and supporting him.

Dances are fun. Even getting dressed up is part of the fun. Normally, Zeke doesn't spend a lot of time thinking about clothes or his appearance—he focuses on what's important to him, which is Jimmy Jr. and wrestling. But he does enjoy the idea of making a little fuss about going to a dance. He and Jimmy Jr. can dance whenever they want but there is something about the whole school getting in on the scheme, in the gym, or wherever, with spiraling colorful disco lights and music that's a little dated because the teachers have at least fifty-percent say in the setlist. There's something special about the whole to-do. And Zeke likes special. He likes spending special time with Jimmy Jr.

Of course, he likes spending all time, special or normal, or anything at all, with Jimmy Jr. Zeke is happy as long as he is with Jimmy Jr. He's not skilled or graceful like Jimmy Jr. but he likes getting his groove on. He likes having a good time. Letting loose and having fun is what he and Jimmy Jr. are best at. He likes seeing Jimmy Jr. happy and he likes being happy with Jimmy Jr. Everything is more fun when they are together.

Zeke is a supportive guy, and not just with Jimmy Jr. So when Joceyln and Tammy start talking about Fall Formal preparations, like what colors and themes they want, and who the celebrity guest is going to be, he is right there with them. Jocelyn and Tammy argue over Kylie Jenner, JoJo Siwa, or Tammy's cousin who is famous on TikTok, and Zeke throws his suggestions into the ring: Barack Obama or his stepmom.

Gene and Tina arrive at the same time as Jimmy Jr. Gene's suggestions for special guests are Tonya Ingram and Lin Manuel Miranda. As usual, once Jimmy Jr. joins them at the lunch table, Zeke hugs him like he always does whenever J-Ju walks into a room or whenever Zeke sees him. J-Ju gives his input on the dance discussion, and Jocelyn listens sympathetically, and a little blankly, and Tammy listens with barely barely hidden annoyance. Zeke listens, enraptured with full attention of course.

Some boys stop by the table, making unsubtle suggestions about wanting to ask Tammy and Jocelyn to the dance. Jocelyn is bright and excited, like a crystal, as she blinks appreciatively at them, and then says, “wait who was that?” when they leave. Tammy pretends she is too good for them and says “keep walking, trash hags,” but makes a big deal out of more boys asking about her than about Jocelyn. Tina tries to get the boys' attention but they are already gone.

“Oh, they're gone,” she notices. Then she turns to Jimmy Jr.

Zeke tries not to balk in anticipation of what she is going to say.

“So, Jimmy Jr, who are you going to the dance with?” Tina asks.

Jocelyn is staring at her tater tots, possibly zoned out, and Tammy is listening with Jimmy Jr. with hawk like precision while pretending to pick at the scrunchie on her wrist.

“I don't know yet, Tina, the dance was just announced today,” Jimmy Jr gets defensive and shuts down like always he does when Tina makes the first move. That girl is persistent, though.

“What, you've never thought about it at all?” Tammy demands, nasal and haughty.

“No, get off my back!”

“I don't know who I'm going with either in case anyone is wondering,” Gene says. “Just kidding, I'm bringing Ken.”

“Gene, shut up about Ken! He isn't real!” Tammy groans.

“Yes he is!”

At the end of the day, when Zeke is alone, after walking Jimmy Jr. home, and after arriving at his own house, Zeke lets himself feel sad about the dance. He knows it is going to be fun. And he wants to have fun no matter what. And he wants Jimmy Junior to be happy no matter what. But he lets himself wish, just for a second, that things could be different—that Jimmy Junior might want to go to the dance with him.

He knows its stupid and complicated to wish for something that can never happen, and he just wants to focus on what he does have, and be happy with that. He wishes he could be happy with that. He didn't know when it changed, or what happened—when he wished for more. Maybe it was always there under the surface, bu the just didn't know it. He want something different, but he knows how school dances always play out.

It's the same every time. Zeke will go stag like he always does. He doesn't want to go with anyone except Jimmy Jr. anyway.

Zeke knows how this is going to go. He is going to support Jimmy Jr. in getting his girl in the most roundabout way. Sometimes it's Tina and sometimes it's not.

Zeke isn't sure Jimmy Jr. even wants Tina. Zeke doesn't know why Jimmy Jr. is so obsessed with her. Maybe it's nostalgia. Maybe Tina was relentless and wore Jimmy Jr. down.

Must be nice.

They don't even make sense together. Not to Zeke. But a lot of things don't make sense to Zeke. A lot of things don't make sense in the world.

Maybe, he tries to reason with himself, he is being greedy. He doesn't need dance time with Jimmy Jr. since he gets all the time with Jimmy Jr. Usually. Most of the time. Maybe not literally every waking second but close enough. But he doesn't like other people sharing special moments with Jimmy Jr. that sounds crazy and of course Jimmy Jr. is allowed to have other friends, but Jimmy Jr. is Zeke's most important special friend. Zeke is always thinking about Jimmy Jr. first and then everyone else. He wishes it was the same for Jimmy Jr. with him.

Zeke tries not to let himself think too much about what he wants, but can't have. There are some thing that he wants that are much easier to achieve. He wants to wrestle. He wants to be with Jimmy Jr. all the time. He wants to wrestle Jimmy Jr.

But he also wants to kiss Jimmy Jr. He can't let himself think about that, because that is not what best friends do.

He's happy to be a supportive best friend. That's what he loves to do. He just hates that being a supportive friend sometimes means orchestrating/creating special quality time for Jimmy Jr. and some random girl.

He tells himself he is happy as long as Jimmy Jr. is happy. He wishes it were true.

Days and weeks pass. Tammy is exceedingly loud about how many boys talked to her and almost asked her to the dance (Zeke doesn't know her criteria for counting an official “ask to the dance” but he suspects it is suspect). Tina is also exceedingly persistent with Jimmy Jr. Zeke will almost get annoyed and then Gene will diffuse the tension. Zeke is grateful for the little dude.

One day after school, on their regular walk home, Jimmy Jr compares the merits of different kinds of percussion instruments when composing a danceable beat, and Zeke listens, enraptured, as usual.

“By the way, Zeke, who are you going to the dance with?”

“You know I'm going stag, bro.”

They stop half a block up from Jimmy Jr.'s house. It's an old habit: Jimmy Jr. used to dislike loitering in front of his house for too long, to avoid Tina. Jimmy Jr. looked troubled, suddenly.

“What's wrong, J-Ju?” Zeke asked, worry squeezing his chest. “You know you can tell me anything. You're my best friend!”

“You're my best friend too, Zeke,” Jimmy Jr. says and Zeke grins at him.

“C'mere,” he says, slapping Jimmy Jr. into a hug. The thoughtful expression remains on Jimmy Jr.'s face.

“Does it bother you when I bring a date to dances?”

Zeke wanted to scream yes! He wanted to scream, just go with me! But he didn't do those things. He had to reply quickly otherwise Jimmy Jr. would know something was up. He made a choked noise in the back of his throat. “Aw, J-Ju,” he started, holding Jimmy Jr's shoulders tightly. “Worried about your buddy. You got me all choked up here.”

“I'm serious, Zeke. You are my best friend. I want you to be happy.”

“And I want you to be happy too, J-Ju. You don't have to worry about me. I just want you to have a good time.”

“I just want Zeke time,” Jimm Jr said passionately.

Zeke looked at him with wide eyes. Maybe he would cry. That's all he wanted too. “And I want my J-Ju time!”

Jimmy Jr's eyes burning with something fierce, almost like when he dances, and Zeke soaks up the attention like a sponge, trying to take in as much as possible.

“Then we should go together!” Jimmy Jr. said.

Zeke's brain short circuited. He wanted to scream, yes! Yes! But... “J-Ju, you don't have to do that for me—”

“I want to!” Jimmy Jr said, and Zeke almost died from happiness. “I want to do this for you. I'm doing it for both of us.”

“Jimmy Jr. it is my honor and pleasure to take you to this dance.”

“Mine, too, Zeke.”

Zeke cannot contain his excitement and happiness anymore. “Let's Fall Formal, y'all!” He grabs onto Jimmy Jr. and wrestles him to the ground. “C'mere!”

“Zeke!”

Zeke has never woken up so excited for a dance ever in his school career. He jumps out of bed with extra gusto. He lets his dad lecture him about a three-day old problem with humor and patience. Nothing is going to stand in the way of finally getting a perfect dance—having Jimmy Jr's full attention.

He thinks nostalgically of his middle school suit—the one with the sleeves ripped off. He wishes he still fit in it. He wonders if it would be funny if he wore it to this dance even if it was too small. He decides on wearing a bright blue sports coat over a black sleeveless shirt (but one of his nice sleeveless shirts, the ones for special occasions) and dark pink shorts that he had at first been terrified of when his stepmom got them for him but she had promised he would be okay and that they were safe. And now he took a liking to them.

He imagines over and over what it will be like to ring Jimmy Jr's doorbell, for him to open the door, for them to stare at each other and trade compliments. His hands sweat and his heart jumps. He feels like he is in some alternate dimension where he gets to relive what he knows will be one of his all time favorite memories of his life. He's hungry, he knows this because he is always a little hungry, but he doesn't taste his food. He doesn't notice that he's scarfed it down because he is still thinking about holding Jimmy Jr's hand as he descends his front steps, opening the car door for him. Looking at the sparkling twilight reflecting off his perfect hair. He knows this moment is going to be perfect.

He can't believe that it's happening, that he, finally, gets to pick Jimmy Jr up from his house and take him to the dance together.

And he's allowed. He's allowed to want this. Because it's already happening.

He takes a deep breath and then rings Jimmy Jr's door bell—for real this time, but it hardly feels real, since he already imagined it so much. The twins open the door and they shriek in excitement. Shuffling from upstairs excites the boys even more. Zeke and the twins look up. In between the banister legs, Zeke sees flashes of burgundy suit and tans shoes as Jimmy Junior comes down the stairs. Zeke thinks he looks an NBA draft pick in that getup even though Jimmy Junior is terrible at basketball.

“Looking sharp, J-Ju!”

“Thanks, Zeke! You too!”

“You look beautiful, man. I'm all choked up.”

“Awww, Zeke. You look so handsome too.”

“Jimmy Jr. I could just kiss you.”

The twins squeal at that and Zeke thinks he might detect a slight blush on his boy Jimmy Jr's face. He doesn't read too much into it. It's probably the bright yellow hallways lights and hallucinations from being too happy.

Zeke doesn't hold back what he wants to say. He and Jimmy Jr. have always told each other everything. But he knows he hides behind the veneer of jokes and exaggeration. He knows he maybe can say all this stuff because Jimmy Jr. knows and trusts him and doesn't think anything weird is going on. He can't break that trust.

They stare at each other in front of the door. Jimmy Jr. asks Ollie to take a picture on his phone.

Zeke itches to touch, itches to hug. He wants to run his hands down the suit and kiss Jimmy Junior's smug look off his face.

He manages to hold all of that back as he waves bye to the twins and opens the car door for Jimmy Jr. He rolls the windows down and whoops as he speeds down the road.

“My hair!” Jimmy Jr. cries.

“Sorry,” Zeke says and slows down immediately.

“Did you see that cop?”

“What, where?”

Still, they get to the dance without any real problems, and Zeke is grateful. Grateful and about to explode with joy.

They are one of the earliest to arrive because Jimmy Jr. doesn't want to miss a single song. The dance committee had to arrive early so Jocelyn and Tammy are already there. Gene and Tina are also there, not because they are on the dance committee, but for some other possible reason. Zeke is happy to see Gene but tries not to let himself be too upset about seeing Tina. He really needs to get this under control. Poor girl. She isn't trying to ruin his life. She just is.

No, Zeke! He tells himself. He smiles at Tina for good measure. She doesn't seem to notice. Oh well.

In twenty minutes or so, the gym fills up dramatically. They say hi to classmates and different friend groups. And, like it's their birthright and destiny, Zeke and Jimmy Jr. are the ones to really “get this party started,” whooping and yelling, and starting a dance circle around them. Zeke loses himself in the dance and the moment and doesn't take his eyes away from Jimmy Jr. for a second.

The boys had taken off their suit coats by now and rolled up their sleeves. Some of the girls put their hair up in ponytails. Everyone was sweaty.

Zeke needs a punch break.

“I'll come too, Zeke,” Jimmy Jr says his sudden lack of motion catching the rest of the dance circle off guard.

Zeke extracts himself from the writhing bodies and makes his way to the snacks and drink table by the folded up bleachers. He pours a cup, and turns, expecting Jimmy Jr to be right behind him. He isn't. Zeke scans the room.

He didn't notice it at first, which is not his finest moment, that Call Me Maybe has started playing. He tracks the room again, honing in further and he spots Jimmy Jr finally. Everyone around him is shout-singing and Jimmy Jr is having his moment, his moment to shine. All his moments are to shine but he is really giving it his all out there.

And Zeke is a little sad he isn't there.

He should just put the punch down and run back out there. Or at least down his punch really fast and get out there.

And he is about to.

When suddenly his gaze cuts through the wiggling and squirming bodies, and sees Jimmy Jr. and Tina circling each other, jerking their bodies violently, throwing their limbs in the air in sync.

He was gone for five seconds. Five.

Hot jealousy oozes out of him, mixing with sweat and anger. He wants to storm over there. He wants to yank Tina away. He wants to grab Jimmy Jr and shake him. He balls up his fists.

He will do none of those things.

Still, he bolts towards them, determinedly, shoulders jamming into people as he passes.

He avoids Jimmy Jr's outstretched limbs and puts a burning palm on his shoulder. Jimmy Jr. doesn't stop dancing. He obstinately doesn't glare at Tina.

“Come on, Jimmy Jr I thought you wanted punch.”

Jimmy Jr. shakes him off. Zeke feels that like a slap to the face. He can't keep his face from scrunching up.

“Zeke you know I can't not dance to this song!”

Tina wriggles past Zeke and gets up next to Jimmy Jr again.

“You need to hydrate, J-Ju!” Zeke tries again.

Something flashes in Jimmy Jr's eyes. Maybe it's the disco lights or spotlights sweeping the room. Maybe it's something else. “Don't tell me not to dance, Zeke!”

“Jimmy Jr, I—“

Jimmy Jr jerks away abruptly and faces Tina.

_BEFORE YOU CAME INTO MY LIFE I MISSED YOU SO BAD I MISSED YOU SO BAD I MISSED YOU_

Zeke imagines a million stupid things he could go. He could unplug the music. He could turn on the lights. He could fight a chaperon. He could flip the snacks and drink table. He could throw the food and drinks into the crowd (food fight?). He could text mean things to everyone.

He could leave.

Zeke storms out of the gym before he does any of that other stuff. He tells himself he really would do those things and everyone deserves it. The world deserves it. He deserves it.

But he knows he wouldn't. He isn't like that. That's not him.

Just entering the hallway where the lights are bright and awkward and it feels like a different world gives him some perspective. Like he definitely isn't going to start a food fight during the Fall Formal. He also definitely isn't going to fight a chaperon.

He has perspective on how not to deal with this problem. But he also has perspective on the problem and how he feels about it.

He leans against the wall, feeling the rough, pocked wall through his drenched tank. He knocks his head back, and looks up between the glaring, humming yellow hallway lights.

Zeke didn't think to imagine something going wrong. He didn't think to imagine that this would even happen in the first place. That he would get to go to a dance with Jimmy Jr. So yea of course he wasn't going to imbue his fantasies with angst and heartbreak.

But maybe he should have.

Because what else could his life amount to?

It's stupid. He was just trying to _help._ Jimmy Jr needs to _hydrate._

Well, no, he was just trying to keep Jimmy Jr away from Tina. Ugh. He lets the anger boil dangerously in his tummy. Tina. His lifelong nemesis, that he didn't know he had. Hadn't wanted to call her that before. But that's what she is, right? Both of them, fighting for Jimmy Jr's love. Jimmy Jr. giving it to neither of them.

Which really isn't fair because Jimmy Jr. hangs out with Zeke more than anyone else in the world. When did that start being enough? When did he start being so greedy?

Maybe he should stop trying to keep them apart. It wasn't going to work. It never worked. Maybe it's destiny that they end up together.

Maybe it's destiny that Zeke can't be happy. Not with Jimmy Jr. anyway. Maybe he should just go home. Jimmy Jr. can get a ride with Tina or Tammy or one of the other millions of girls who are in love with him.

He takes a deep, shaking breath. He presses his elbows back against the wall, and feels the sensation sip through his arms.

Zeke should have known this would happen. He should have known. He didn't get a happy ending. He is a side character. An assistant to Jimmy Jr's act, a supporting character to Jimmy Jr's central role. Maybe it's his fault. Maybe he 's the one who positioned Jimmy Jr as central to his life. He should live his own life. It just made sense at the time. Jimmy Jr is important to him. He loves Jimmy Jr. It wasn't a problem before that Jimmy Jr is his everything.

Until it was a problem.

Until it always is a problem that Zeke tries his best, tries with everything he has, to ignore.

He suddenly wants to be alone. He doesn't want to be pestered. Asked about. He doesn't want people to ask him if he is okay because he isn't. He doesn't want to pretend for anyone.

He presses off the wall and starts for the double doors. But won't people be in and out of there a lot? He needs somewhere to _hide._

But he also needs some air. He'll figure it out once he's outside.

The night air is glorious on his sticky skin. The hair by his temples and right above his forehead are stiff, slick with salty sweat. He waits for the chill to quell his anger.

He hears the door click open again behind him and he tenses and turns around. But it's some kids he doesn't know and they ignore him. Their hands are on each other, they are stuck together, wobbling down the stairs and past Zeke to the parking lot. He hates them. He shouldn't be he does and he just lets him feel it for a moment. But he also can't stop judging himself for it. He can't be mad at every single happy person for the rest of his life. That isn't fair.

The door clicks open a few more times and kids keep leaving and none of them pay him any mind. Looks like being invisible wasn't going to be a problem. Even if a kid or two waves they don't try to talk to him. Maybe he's giving off more mopey vibes than he originally thought.

The door clicks open again and he doesn't bother turning and checking who it is.

“Zeke?”

He turns ready with a fake smile.

He startles.

“Gene?”

“The one and only,” Gene agrees. He comes to sit down next to Zeke. “How's your Fall Formal going?”

“Fine,” Zeke lies. “What about you?”

“Can't complain,” Gene says. “But I will.”

“What's going on?”

“Oh, nothing, Ken had to take a call from his agent. I told him don't worry about it, he can't put his life on hold for me. I understand. He understands. We're good.”

Zeke almost wants to ask, double check, like—is Ken real?—but he just lets it go with a sigh.

Gene nudges him.

Zeke looks up.

“What's up, buddy?”

Zeke looks into Gene's earnest eyes. He hadn't really thought of Gene as a confidant. He always thought of him as someone who's jokes always make Zeke laugh—and sometimes even think.

Zeke sighs. “Oh. Well. Nothing.”

Gene turns to look up at the sky. Zeke follows his gaze. There aren't many stars to be seen because the school parking lot lights are so bright.

“Alright,” Gene says. “Well, if you want to talk about it, I'm here for you.”

“Aren't you going back into the dance?”

Gene nudges him with his shoulder again. “I will if you want me to. But if you want some company, I could use some fresh air.”

“Alright.”

They sit next to each other, shoulders brushing.

Zeke wants to say something. He does. But he doesn't know what to say.

“Why is life so difficult?” he asks instead, staring until the line between the grass and the sky blurs. He shuts his eyes against the tears.

“I'm sorry, Zeke. Maybe it's not as bad as you think.”

“Why are feelings so gross? I just want to feel happy.”

“Yeah. It's a package deal, though.”

“Yeah.”

Gene bumps his shoulder into his again. “You'll be okay, though.”

Zeke smiles wryly. “How can you be so sure?”

“You're Zeke!” Gene exclaims. “You're the man!”

“I am,” Zeke agrees, a small giggle almost bubbling out of him. He looks at Gene for a long moment. “Thanks, Gene.”

“No problem, buddy.”

Gene offers his hand and Zeke takes it. He can't help but feel joy sprouting at the human contact. The sympathetic, caring contact. He nudges Gene and Gene bumps back.

“You ready to go back in?” Gene asks.

Zeke balks. Maybe he isn't. “You should go in if you want.”

“Okay.”

Gene gets up, and Zeke follows him. “A hug for the road?” Gene asks.

Zeke smiles and claps Gene in for a hug.

They stay like that for a long time.

“You are a great guy and a good friend,” Gene says.

“I was just about to say the same thing about you!”

“Whatever you are sad about, it will pass.”

“Probably not.”

“Or you can resolve it.”

“Maybe.”

“Or you can move away with me to Belize, away from this mess.”

A laugh startles out of Zeke's throat. “You got it, buddy.”

“Zeke? What the hell?”

Zeke springs back from Gene in shock. The yellow school lights illuminate Jimmy Jr's form from behind. Jimmy Jr stalks up to them.

“Uh oh,” Gene says, backing away slowly.

“What are you doing out here?” Jimmy Jr snarls.

“I needed some air, J-Ju.”

“And you left me in there all alone.”

“Okay I'm going back inside let me know if you need anything bye—” Gene disappears into the school.

Zeke snorts and shakes his head. “What's your problem, J-Ju.”

“We were supposed to go to this dance together. Why are you out here with him?”

Zeke wants to be cruel. He wants to stand up for himself. He wants to hurt Jimmy Jr like he hurt Zeke. “Why are you even here? Go dance with Tina.” he chokes out instead.

Jimmy Jr snorts. “Are you kidding me? I don't want to dance with her.”

“That's not what it looked like.” Zeke ignores the aghast look on Jimmy Jr's face. “It's whatever, J-Ju,” Zeke says, glaring dark and hollow into the grass. “I know how it goes.”

“Zeke, what are you talking about? How what goes?”

Zeke snaps his gaze up. “You pretend to not like her or sometimes you do like her and sometimes you don't. And clearly you are back into liking her again so just go. Be happy. I'm happy if you are happy.”

“You aren't happy now, Zeke.” Jimmy Jr looks at him pleadingly and Zeke's shattered heart shatters more. “Just tell me what's wrong, so I can fix it.”

“You can't fix this, okay?”

Jimmy Jr looks like he doesn't believe him. Zeke takes a deep breath but Jimmy Jr grunts out, “Fine.”

Zeke nods at him. “Fine,” he agrees.

Jimmy Jr studies him like he is trying to decipher what is really going on. It pisses Zeke off.

“Right, but you are still mad at me?” Jimmy Jr asks.

Zeke puffs out a little laugh, a ghost of a sound, rolling out like tumbleweed between them. “Yeah, I'm a little mad, J-Ju. Sue me.”

“I don't want to sue you. I just want you to tell me what's wrong!”

Zeke prickles. He stomps towards Jimmy Jr, puts his nose in Jimmy Jr's face. “Okay, you really want to know? I'll tell you. We finally go to a dance together which is what I have wanted for so long. And I was stupid enough to think it would g perfectly. But why would it? It just ended up like every other time.” Zeke takes a deep breath but it goes through his throat like sandpaper. “I thought it would be different,” he chokes out. He hates how weak and hurt he sounds. He hates that he's hurt. He hates that Jimmy Jr has this power over him. But he should have known that was true a long time ago. He just didn't understand the consequences until now.”

Jimmy Jr looks at him like the world is broken. “I didn't know, Zeke,” Jimmy Jr say softly.

“I just wanted—“ Zeke doesn't know how to phrase this. “I just... I wanted to be enough for you. But I will never be enough for you,. And I get that now.”

Jimmy Jr clutches his wrist. Zeke wants to break away but he feels tired. He wants to fall into the earth and go to sleep forever.

“Zeke, what are you saying? You are all I want.”

“Tina is all you want,” Zeke retorts, feeling himself cave inward. He yanks his wrist out of Jimmy Jr's grip and crosses his arms in front of his chest.

“She thought it was like all the other times where we are always together even if we aren't officially going to a dance together!”

Zeke snorts. “Yeah, well, silly me, thinking we could go to a dance officially together.”

“We did that, Zeke, so why are you still upset?”

“You wouldn't understand.”

“Let's go dance more. Would that make you feel better?”

“Just go, J-Ju. I need to be alone right now.”

By now, Zeke's mind is made up. He is going home and Jimmy Jr can get a ride with someone else. He needs to go inside and get his jacket, though. Maybe Gene could grab it for him?

He knows he shouldn't risk another glance back at Jimmy Jr. But its impossible to ignore him when he's right there.

Jimmy Jr looks terrified.

“Zeke...”

Zeke stills and waits.

“Do you really want that?”

“What?”

“To... be together?”

Zeke tries to cough through the bog coagulating in his throat. “It doesn't matter now,” he says roughly.

Jimmy Jr looks _sorry._ “I didn't know you wanted that.”

Zeke looks at him, rueful. “That's all I wanted.”

Jimmy Jr steps towards him. He extracts Zeke's hands from his armpits with a light tug. “Zeke, you're my everything.”

“And you're mine,” Zeke says, almost on autopilot.

“I love you, Zeke.”

“I love you, too.”

“Do you...want to like, kiss and stuff?”

Zeke looks at him and shrugs. “I mean. Yeah, I do, Jimmy Jr.”

“Can I kiss you, then?”

Zeke searches Jimmy Jr's face. Then he thinks, screw it, and says, “hell yea, man.”

They lean into each other.

Jimmy Jr's cheeks are hot but his lips are cold. Zeke doesn't know where to put his hands, hovers them above Jimmy Jr's waist, splays them across his back.

Jimmy Jr. leans back. “I don't know how to kiss a boy,” he said.

“It's the same as kissing a girl, I reckon.”

“It's not,” Jimmy Jr says.

They look down.

“Do you really want to do this?” Zeke asks.

“Yes,” Jimmy Jr says. “If you do.”

“I do.”

“I'm sorry,” Jimmy Jr says. “I should have been paying more attention to your feelings.”

“I'm sorry I didn't say them out loud, and make this whole thing easy.”

Jimmy Jr took Zeke's hand. Something small and warm blossoms in Zeke's heart.

“Do you want to dance with me?” Jimmy Jr asks.

Zeke smiles, watery and grateful. “That's all I've ever wanted,” he chokes out.

“C'mere, Zeke,” Jimmy Jr says, and tackle-hugs him.

Jimmy Jr lets Zeke wrestle him to the ground, and Zeke's tears fall on Jimmy Jr's suit and his cheek. They go inside and have the dance of their lives. And afterwards, they kiss in Zeke's car, and it's not the same as kissing a girl—it's special and unique to both of them, and the warm happy feeling curls inside Zeke's heart, and settles, like it's going to be there a while.


End file.
